Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
