yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
