I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
