I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
