question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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