# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
