News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Boobs are out for the taking
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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