you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
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