i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
