I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
