wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
