So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
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I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
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well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.