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I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
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