This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
