his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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