he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
