Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
