I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
smell my finger.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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