So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
