I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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