Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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