I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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