You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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