Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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