We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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