I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
