is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
