If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
you never un-have a 4some
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
