Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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