remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
