I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
