Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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