So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize