Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
P.S. I can't hear my feet
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
