is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
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