I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
