Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
