You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
