i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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