that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
