My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
