I think i peed on brittanys purse
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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