I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
