its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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