The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
