All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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