yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
my liver is dry heaving
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
