Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
