i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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