I wish I could punch you in the face.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
