tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize