So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
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You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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