Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
In other news, I just burned my penis
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Randomize
