Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
